Wednesday, October 5, 2005

Uncle Orson You Aren't My Favorite Today

**Editor's Note: No, it has not escaped my mind that there is a new Supreme Court nominee to discuss, actually I've been chosen to chair a panel discussion during ISU's Political Awareness Week on the topic of Harriet Meirs, I just choose to vent my frustrations instead.

So I have been in the past the biggest fan of Orson Scott Card's Uncle Orson Reviews Everything website. I have commented many times on his fine reviews and have even followed his lead on certain opinions, but Uncle Orson has stepped over the line with me today.

Never mind that I know all kinds of history and geography and literature
answers. Because when they ask about literature, it's likely to be some lame-o
question about Bridges of Madison County or The Da Vinci Code or some disgusting
James Patterson gorefest, and when they ask about geography, it's likely to be
about the seating capacity of some famous sports arena in Barcelona or Mexico
City or Ann Arbor.

First and foremost--"lame-o question"!?!? Bridges of Madison County happens to be a favorite of mine as is its author Robert James Waller and "disgusting James Patterson gorefest"... Now that's getting personal Uncle Orson. On that literary throne you claim to sit upon, do you not appreciate the brilliance of Alex Cross and a true psychological thriller? Evidently not. No, I know exactly what it is, it's the sex and language. You couldn't possibly like an author as creative as James Patterson the minute he drops the f-bomb. He loses all respect and credibility then, doesn't he? Come to think of it, the reason Orson Scott Card couldn't possibly like Bridges is the morality issue. He couldn't possibly still be sore that they cast Meryl to play a very Italian character. Sure, Waller's approach to writing isn't as stylistic and smooth as yours Orson, but he writes about real life. You ever tried that??

Granted, Orson did comment on the writing and believeability of the premise in The X-Files, he even said it had charm, but you can't take stabs at Waller and Patterson without pushing a button or two with me. I was so irritated and surprised by the dig I was sure at any moment he was going to say, "oh yeah, and Tara, how about those Braves today?"

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